Love and care: supporting your partner through long-term health challenges

Collaborative Post | If your significant other is going through a severe and protracted medical ordeal, then you will want to provide all of the support you reasonably can. But doing this doesn’t just mean being a willing and supportive partner; it also means having a structure and routine. Caring for a partner is often a long process, and having the right structure will help you to provide support in a sustainable way.
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Let’s take a look at a few things worth considering.

Photo by Hector Reyes on Unsplash

Establishing a supportive daily routine

Effective care often means developing the right habits and routines. You might get up at the same time every morning, take a few minutes for yourself, and then start preparing for the day ahead. Simple tasks, like preparing breakfast, can become overwhelming if you have to think extensively about them.
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Good routines aren’t just a benefit for the person providing care, but also for the person receiving it. They can provide structure to the day, and help maintain a sense of progress, even during difficult periods.

Managing medical and emotional needs

​The person you’re caring for might have specific medical needs, depending on the type of injury or illness they’re suffering from. Managing these effectively is often a matter of planning ahead – which is where habits, routines, and to-do lists are vital. But you’ll also need to be prepared to react to sudden emergencies and unforeseen developments. In other words, your routines will need to be flexible enough to cope with sudden emergencies.
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The same goes for emotional problems. If your partner is having a really rough day, you’ll need to be able to drop everything, or change your plans accordingly. In some cases, you might need to seek support in a hurry – so make sure that you know exactly who to call.

Open communication and emotional resilience

Of course, if your partner is suffering, they’ll need to be able to express themselves in a way that you can understand. For this reason, developing a habit of talking, and talking openly about the struggle you’re both navigating, can be extremely healthy. Being able to recognise problematic emotions, like anger and frustration, and defuse them, is also beneficial – and this is a skill that can often be picked up during therapy, with a professional counsellor.

Seeking professional and community support

Acting as a caregiver for your partner can often mean serving many different roles. You’ll be a cook one moment, a nurse the next, and a chauffeur shortly after that. Sometimes, you’ll come up against obstacles you aren’t prepared for – and that’s when it’s time to call in a professional. Counsellors, physiotherapists, and other medical practitioners can all make a difference. The same goes for legal professionals with specialised expertise. For example, solicitors with a background in medical negligence might pursue brain injury claims on your behalf, leaving you free to focus on what really matters.
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It’s also important that you leverage the support of a wider community. Talking to like-minded people who are in the same position as you can be an invaluable way to find perspective.

Avoiding caregiver burnout

As a caregiver, you might be doing emotionally exhausting labour for days on end without a break. Burnout is almost inevitable – that is, unless you anticipate this problem, and take steps to address it. Talk to your partner about the need for you to take a break, before that need becomes obvious. Draft friends and family members to act as a substitute for you, even if it’s just for a few hours each week. Try not to feel guilty about taking a break – in the long run, you’re supporting not just your own wellbeing, but your partner’s, too.


Disclaimer: this is a collaborative post.