How to find the right home care | 12 tips for choosing a carer for your loved one

Finding the right care for an elderly parent can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re trying to balance their independence with the growing need for support.. Over the past year or so, it has become apparent that my dad needed a little bit more help at home, he's been living alone since my mum had to go and live in a nursing home due to advanced Alzheimer's.  Having been looked after by my mum for 60 years it was quite an adjustment, both emotionally and practically!

My dad is 88 now and fiercely independent, fortunately he is still mentally sharp but his mobility has declined, we've gradually introduced a few things to help like a stair lift and walking aids.  Me and my two sisters live nearby but we wanted to make sure our time with him stayed focussed on keeping him company, fun outings, celebrations, and doing family stuff and not personal care.

After lots of family discussions, we introduced a carer into his routine: someone to visit for one hour each morning, six days a week. It’s made a huge difference, she helps him get dressed, prepares breakfast, organises medication, tidies the house, and checks if he needs shopping or errands done. More importantly, they chat, and he no longer starts the day alone.
​
Through this experience, I learned a lot about what matters when choosing a carer. If you’re currently navigating this journey for a parent or loved one, here are my top tips to help you feel confident about your decision - plus a great offer from Country Cousins, who provide compassionate, one-on-one carers across the UK.

This blog post contains an affiliate link - get £50 off your care membership with Country Cousins (see below).

How to find the right home care for a loved one - tips based on my recent experience with my dad

12 tips for choosing the right home care for an elderly parent

1. Start with what your parent really needs - make a list of the day-to-day tasks they struggle with. Is it help getting washed and dressed? Making meals? Keeping the house clean? Or simply companionship? This will help guide the level of care required and shape your conversations with care providers.

2. Prioritise maintaining independence at home - for many older people, staying in familiar surroundings is essential for their wellbeing. Country Cousins specialises in compassionate, part of full-time home care that allows individuals to live safely and independently at home with one-on-one support that feels personal, not clinical.

3. Involve your parent in the decision -  if possible, include your loved one in discussions about care. We gently introduced the idea to my dad and reassured him it wasn’t about losing independence, it was about making life easier and safer. That made all the difference in getting his approval.

4. Think about personality fit - a carer will be spending regular, often quite personal time with your loved one. Ask about personality, hobbies, and interests, a good rapport makes daily visits feel like a social highlight and not a chore.

5. Consider the schedule carefully - you don’t need to jump straight into full-time care. We began with just one hour each morning and it’s been the perfect starting point. Many homecare services, including Country Cousins, offer flexible arrangements that can be adjusted as needs change.

6. Look for experience with similar situations - whether your loved one has dementia, mobility challenges, or just needs a friendly face each day, look for carers who understand and have supported similar needs. A well-matched carer can make a world of difference.

7. Check for continuity of care - continuity is key. Ask whether the same carer can visit consistently, this builds trust, familiarity, and routine. It’s one of the reasons my dad’s mornings now feel calmer and more enjoyable and we worry less!

8. Ask about training and background checks - while carers aren’t medical professionals, they should be trained in basic care and safety. Make sure any provider carries out DBS checks and offers proper training to their carers.

9. Clarify communication and updates - find out how you'll stay informed about how things are going. Some services provide regular updates or a family portal (we use an app called Jointly) others may rely on calls or messages. Knowing what to expect will give you peace of mind.

10. Don’t overlook the little things - it’s the smaller daily tasks like checking hearing aids, managing the bins or making sure medication is organised and taken, that really matter. A great carer will take the initiative and adapt to your loved one’s routine.

11. Trial periods are helpful - if your loved one is hesitant, a short-term or trial arrangement can ease the transition. We treated the first few weeks as a 'see how it goes' period, which helped everyone feel more comfortable.

12. Trust your instincts - above all, trust your gut. You’ll know when something feels right or when it doesn’t. Compassion, reliability, and clear communication go a long way in creating a supportive and safe environment.

Why choose home care over a residential nursing home?

We knew we weren’t ready to consider residential nursing care for our dad - not while he was still mentally independent and keen to stay in his own home. Having a carer has allowed him to retain his routine while also giving us peace of mind that someone is checking in on him each morning.  Things might change and we will monitor carefully and if he feels he needs something more then we will support that, letting him make his own decisions for as long as possible is a priority.

If you’re considering help at home for an elderly loved one, I genuinely recommend exploring your options.

Country Cousins is a trusted UK service that connects families with experienced, empathetic carers, often within as little as 24 hours. Their approach is built around flexible, one-to-one home care that supports individuals to live well in the comfort and familiarity of their own space whether that is live-in or visiting care.

With a proud heritage dating back to 1959, Country Cousins is the UK’s longest-established introductory live-in care agency. Over the decades, they have built an outstanding reputation for providing compassionate, personalised support, helping thousands of families find the right carer for their loved ones.

Please use my referral link for £50 off your care membership with Country Cousins (part of Trinity Homecare*).

Love from
Michelle xx

​
Disclaimer: While this post is based on my personal experience sourcing care for a loved one, I have not used Country Cousins myself. The tips provided are for general guidance only. Please ensure you carry out your own thorough research and checks before choosing a carer.  This blog post contains an affiliate link which means I may earn some commission if you sign up using my unique link.

* Country Cousins is part of the Trinity Homecare Group — a leading UK provider of care services. Although the referral form may display the Trinity branding, it connects you directly to Country Cousins services, with the same high standards and personalised care.

Or scan here to access £50 off your care membership with Country Cousins